Big test tomorrow and what do I do? Everything else but study. It’s like the only thing in the whole world that has the power to really make me active is the urge to avoid doing something. Which at least to me seems a little backwards.
So, school is ending soon (last week of classes at hand now) and the panic is settling in. It’s always the same thing with me when school ends. And I don’t mean the ending of a school year, but the ending of the whole of that level of school. It always means that you lose contact with certain people, and that sucks. It’s like, for the past three years I’ve spent most of my time in this school, or then doing things, homework, projects, studying for tests, for this school, so it feels like life outside of it barely exists.
For a long time I was dead set on not doing my master’s quite yet, but taking a year off and going to work and all that, but now I’m not so sure. Maybe I won’t go back after all, who knows. Maybe I forget to apply a year from now and have to wait longer, and then forget all about it, all so comfortable in the working life and all that.
Okay, fine, I still don’t think that would happen, but then again who knows. I took a year off before entering University, but there were good enough reasons for that (I didn’t know the language, first of all, and I really needed to rest my brain before going for another round of hell), but what really helped, I think now, was that I didn’t do anything for that whole year. I stayed at home. Sitting. Alone. Bored. So yes, it was easy to want to go back to school.
But what if it’s different now when I start working – if I get a job -, and the same thing happens to me as happened to my older brother, who never went back.
I wouldn’t want that to happen. But who knows what my opinion is a year from now.
I’ve been reading a lot – trying to distract my mind from thinking about these things -, and consequently, wanting to write about the books I’ve read, but don’t really seem to have the patience for it.
Let’s see, I have read…
1. Jules Verne – Journey to the Centre of the Earth
A little too “scientific” for me, and too “still”, but it was a nice enough little book to read in between all the huge works I read. I didn’t really like the fact that they didn’t actually reach the center, either, but well…
2. Cassandra Clare – City of Bones
Enjoyed this one very much, even though it seemed a little too ‘easy reading’ next to The Passage and The Historian, for example. But I’m most likely going to buy more of the series. The problem for me is that there’s so many books in the series already, and I usually prefer books that stand alone.
3. Stephen Chbosky- The Perks of Being a Wallflower
I think I’ll eventually write a longer thing about this. But yes, after an initial ‘nah’, I didn’t think it was too bad.
Now I bought Bram Stoker’s Dracula – finally – and I’m trying to read it a little slower, just so that it lasts a little longer than a week. And it would help if I could get myself to focus on tests and essays instead of getting too hooked on another book, but we’ll see. I wanted to buy another book, too, but they only had a really expensive edition of it at the store. Let’s see if they manage to inform me when the cheaper one gets there, this time.
Oh, yes, and I started my very own Tumblr, to put some shorter thoughts and whatnots in there, so if anyone’s interested, you will find me there as well.